©2003 by Barbara Mazzarella
Note: The following is an excerpt fromBach Flower Remedies for Children: A Parents' Guide , published 1997 by Healing Arts Press, Rochester, VT, and reprinted here with their permission. This parent-friendly guide to the Bach remedies contains wise and valuable parenting advice, as well as charming fairy tales for the children about the remedies they need.
Honeysuckle (shown here) is for children who are homesick, for the first days of school, or for vacations when they want to go home. It is for those who are stuck in the past and refuse to grow. For this reason, it is beneficial to children who do not want to grow up, like Peter Pan. They may be thirteen years old and still go on vacation clutching a teddy bear stained and musty with age.
If they are visiting relatives or going off to camp, give them Honeysuckle to help them enjoy their vacation without suffering from homesickness. This remedy is also useful for adolescents stuck in infantile attitudes and behavior, rebelling against the normal evolutionary process.
What these children need is a sense of continuity. Accustom them to the fact that, although the past is valid and memories are beautiful and important, the here and now is where we live our lives. If you need them to break a childish habit, like needing a pacifier or blanket, combine Honeysuckle with Walnut, for the transition, so that they may suffer less while breaking the tie.
Walnut children find transitions particularly difficult because of their ingrained ambivalence. They know what they want to do, but they let other people convince them to let it go. This remedy should be administered in times of change: teething, weaning (with Red Chestnut), the first days of day care or elementary school, moving, or going on vacation. It is helpful when children are oversensitive, absorbing and reacting to negative influences in and out of the home.
Make sure that you're not impeding their growth in any way yourself. It's disturbing as well as wonderful to see them mature, but our responsibilities as parents, teachers, and caregivers lies in watching them grow up and in letting them grow.
Editor's Note: A theme we frequently return to is that our children's and pets' processes often go hand in hand with our own processes, and so we ourselves often need the very essence that we give them. Here, parents who are nostalgic for their child's younger days -- maybe experiencing the empty nest syndrome -- could also use Honeysuckle and Walnut. (See our theme issue, Essences and the Family System, as well as our Virtual Booklet, Children and Essences) For another excerpt from this invaluable book, see Larch.
ABOUT THE BOOK AND AUTHOR: In addition to her extensive study of the Bach flower system, Barbara Mazzarella has worked in nursery and elementary schools for more than twenty years in Milan, Italy. This excerpt was drawn from her book, Bach Flower Remedies for Children: A Parents' Guide. It is reprinted with permission of the publisher, Healing Arts Press, an imprint of Inner Traditions, Rochester, VT 05767.ART CREDITS: Word of Mouth Web Design and Art Today.